Baby hair is strange. Some babies arrive with a huge mop. Others without a hair on their heads. Then there are the in-between cases: the monk’s tonsure, the isolated tuft on top. And the colour? With this “birth hair”, you never know. Jet black when both parents are blond. Red when both are dark-haired. Or blond when both are blond, of course. Anything can happen.
And it gets stranger: in the first six months, babies shed this early hair—nothing happens to the bald ones, obviously. Little by little, or almost overnight. “Darling, are you sure about that new shampoo?”
“The dog seems to like it, anyway.”
Then the first “real” hair starts growing. Each child has their own timetable. Six months? A year? Two years? Eventually, the question of cutting it will arise. All right, but…
When?
In some cultures, there is no question to ask: the first haircut has a scheduled date. Like the compulsory French paediatric check-ups, but without the health record booklet.
Among some Orthodox Jewish families, patience is the rule: the first haircut waits until the third birthday. The tradition draws a parallel with trees, whose fruit is not harvested during their first three years. The haircut is a religious and family celebration marking the start of religious education. For those who keep sidelocks, those are already off limits.
Other traditions are quicker. In traditional Muslim families, the baby’s head may be shaved seven days after birth, alongside the sacrifice of one or two sheep—traditionally one for a girl, two for a boy. The original French text called this a “baptism”; the ceremony is the aqiqah, not a Christian baptism.
Some Chinese families also shave a baby’s head, this time to celebrate the first month. The family marks this auspicious haircut with as many red decorations, foods and clothes as possible: red is the colour of good fortune. A lucky break, in any case, for a baby with a tonsure: less time spent sporting Alain Juppé’s hairstyle.
Alain Juppé is a French politician known for his receding hairline.
“Well, thanks. I didn’t ask for any of this.”
Why?
No first appointment dictated by your culture or family traditions? Then it is up to you to decide when—and therefore why—it is time. How do you choose?
If a fringe constantly hangs in front of your child’s eyes, it is obviously worth considering a trim. It restricts their view. The original went further, suggesting that repeatedly looking at the fringe could cause a squint: “What’s that dangling in front of my eyes? Oh yes, my hair.” Two hundred times a day. See the clarification below about that claim.
Another urgent case: you waited too long and the baby’s fine hair has fused into impossible dreadlocks. That is not a problem in itself, but if you cannot resist trying to untangle them, tears are guaranteed at every hair wash. To prevent it, the easiest approach is to use a baby brush when the hair is wet, or even soapy. It glides more easily.
A more controversial reason to schedule a little boy’s first haircut: long hair makes him look like a little girl. In summer 2018, Justin Timberlake posted a photograph of his son with a glorious rock-star mane. Some commenters were outraged by this affront to their definition of respectable hair. Plenty of others defended the adorable curls.
“If that pic doesn’t say ‘City Of Love’ then I’m out…”
Justin Timberlake, 6 July 2018.
Really, when your dad is Justin Timberlake and your mum is Jessica Biel, your style is probably not something to worry about. But let’s not forget hair at the nape has an unfortunate tendency to grow faster than the rest. Boy or girl, when a mullet starts appearing, it is time to act.
How?
Some people have tried cutting their baby’s hair themselves. But if you would rather avoid trouble, call a professional. Someone like Khaled—pronounced “Kaled”—from ZOUAK Artisan Coiffeur in Paris’s 11th arrondissement. A hairdresser for babies, children and adults of both sexes, and father of two children, also of both sexes, he shared his advice and stories about cutting very young children’s hair.
First, how do you choose the salon that will welcome your offspring? Technically, any hairdresser can cut anyone’s hair. There is no special qualification for babies. For Khaled, the key is to “make sure you go somewhere children are welcome”. Are children’s prices displayed? Is there a pile of children’s books beside the grown-up magazines? Oh, a miniature motorbike-shaped chair!
The appointment is booked. Who is going to take the child? Khaled sees everyone: dads, mums, grandparents, even nannies. In his experience, mothers tend to fiddle with the child’s hair to explain the cut they want, perhaps because they are a little anxious. It makes the child tense and complicates the hairdresser’s job. He says fathers do not tend to do this. Shall we go, then?
This is Khaled’s personal observation, not a rule about mothers and fathers.
The new hairstyle starts now
Remember to discuss it beforehand. “You’re getting your first haircut! How exciting. Aunt Laura gave me mine. It was a complete disaster. But it grew back quickly.”
And do arrive early if you can, so your child can get used to the place and look at everyone before somebody starts handling their head. Failing that, just arrive on time: “Hairdressers are always running late.”
Time to begin? For the first visits, the simplest thing is to have your child on your lap. The youngest do not need shampooing; a spray of water is enough. An experienced professional will know how to distract your child from the troubling fact that a stranger is snipping away part of their being!
One of Khaled’s colleagues always styles the child’s comfort toy first. Khaled tells them all sorts of things and is not above promising a few sweets as a reward. “You don’t go to the hairdresser every day.” He also makes sure to warn children before using anything potentially startling, such as clippers or a hairdryer.
What have I done?
In the end, it went reasonably well. You are on the way home. Your child is eating their lollipop. Everyone is happy. Tonight, perhaps tomorrow, you may have a little moment of astonishment. Your child will look at you with eyes made bigger by their shorter hair, and you will realise how suddenly grown-up they seem.
Gone is the old fluff, the forlorn tonsure, the newborn’s untidy hair. Your child will not care in the slightest, but you will feel emotional. That first trip to the hairdresser closes a chapter.
“Make it a ritual your children look forward to,” Khaled concludes. “Go back to the same hairdresser if it went well, and always plan the same activities: a hot chocolate, a trip to the park, an ice cream, a cartoon. Make it a celebration.”
Have a baby hairdresser to recommend? Send us the name. We’ll pass it on.
Photo: Tommy van Kessel.